Earn The Trust And Love Will Come After
by Rinienne
Summary: Dean, Sam and Bobby found a lead on Leviathans, but when one of the monsters had been captured, he told Dean that Castiel was still alive. Major angst, consent issues, hurt, but happy end; 2 or 3 parts; Dean/Castiel; NC-17.
1. Chapter 1

**Title:** Earn The Trust And Love Will Come After;  
><strong>Rating:<strong> NC-17;  
><strong>Genre:<strong> romance, angst, hurt/comfort, dreams/nightmares;  
><strong>PairingCharacters:** Levia!Dean/Castiel, Dean/Castiel, Sam, Bobby, Jodie Mills;  
><strong>Spoilers:<strong> spoilers for 7x6;**  
><strong>**Beta**: Un'beta'ed, all mistakes are my own;  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Sexual content, language, major hurt and consent issues;  
><strong>Summary<strong>: Castiel went stiff in hunter's arms, not quite believing how close they were, but then relaxed enjoying the warm body pressed against his, exhaling Dean's smell. For some weird reasons Dean smelt like morass and fish, but Castiel was just too happy to pay any attention on that. All what mattered to him that now he was safe.

* * *

><p><strong>Earn the trust and love will come after<strong>

Gray outlines of lights and shadows slowly started to form a blurry picture before Dean's eyes. The hunter tried to turn his head towards the light but the movement echoed in his head with a dull pain, making him snap his eyes closed. When the ache in his head slowly started to fade, Dean tried to open his eyes once again. This time he was able to see his surroundings better: he was in a dark room with the only one source of light illuminating it slightly. Dean at first thought that the light was coming from a window, but the second glance on the source indicated that it wasn't actually a window, but a glass screen dividing two areas one of which was brightly lid. Dean still couldn't quite see the environment around him, but the room on the another side from the screen was small, with a metal table and four chairs in the middle and other than that – empty.

Dean concentrated on his vision as he noticed a small motion in the corner of the brightly lit room. There in the corner was laying a man, curled in a ball like an injured animal. The man was wearing a black slacks and a shirt which probably had been white some time ago, but it was so dirty now that it was nearly impossible to determinate the original color. The man moved his head facing the hunter and Dean's heart suddenly started to beat too fast in his chest, as he was finally able to recognize the face.

"Cas!" He whispered and jolted up from a chair he was sitting on.

Unfortunately the hunter realized that he couldn't move a single inch from it as his wrists were tied to the armrest of the chair, as were his legs and waist. In fact, the ropes around him were so tight that the abrupt movement hurtled him yet again, making the hunter hiss through his teeth.

"So, it looks like you finally woke up." He heard a voice from the left side and turned his head in the direction of it.

Here in the corner of the dark room leaning on a small metal table, was standing a man in a police uniform. The man was staring at the glass screen with a wide grin as he spoke. Dean tried to understand what was it all about, but his head was aching like someone hit him pretty hard. Thinking about it, the hunter was actually sure that was exactly what happened to him.

"Who the hell are you?" Dean groaned trying to pull as much confidence to his voice as he only could in his current condition.

The man finally turned his head to look at the hunter and smiled wide. "Oh, you still didn't get it, did you?" He asked. Then the policeman flinched and wrenched his head in a very nonrealistic way, opening his mouth wide. Several layers of sharp teeth and a long snake-like tongue showed from his huge chaps and the memory of what exactly happened to the hunter clicked in Dean's head.

It had happened during one of their investigations when he and Bobby discovered another lead on the Leviathans. They even had been able to catch one of them and Dean was about to cut his head off as the bastard smirked and said something that made hunter's hand flinch so he missed the neck, swinging the machete and cutting the Leviathans shoulder instead. The bastard of course had not even winced glancing as his arm fell into the floor. "Oh, you didn't know? Helpless, powerless angel boy is alone, always calling your name in a hope his brave righteous man will come to the rescue!" The Leviathan had said laughing. "And you have spent more than a month not even knowing that he is still alive! You not even bothered yourself to try to look, while he was here, in Sioux Falls the whole time!"

The second blow of the hunter hadn't missed the aim and the still laughing Leviathan's head had been sent to a fly across the room.

Of course Dean knew that all monsters lied. That what he used to tell himself all the time if he heard them telling something he didn't want to believe, or, like in this case, he wanted to believe too much. But more the hunter thought about it, more he knew how wrong he was and the thought made the hunter feel like a total jerk.

Sam still didn't want to talk to him after what Dean had done to Amy, but hearing the news about Castiel he had arrived back to the forest cabin they were staying in and threw a bunch of articles he printed from the internet under his older brother's nose. "He is my friend too…" He had whispered in explanation before turning and moving away from his brother.

The information they had been able to dig out led Dean to a police station in Sioux Falls. Three hunters had worked out a plan of actions and were going to pay a visit to the station next morning, but like a proud man Dean was, he had simply ran away in the middle of the night alone. He wasn't sure why had he done it, trying to convince himself that it was because he didn't want to risk his brother's and Bobby's life, but deep down something was telling him that it wasn't true. A strong feeling of guilt and remorse had been leading him that night, for all he had or hadn't done to prevent this situation on the first place.

And then everything had been like in a blur: the arriving at the closed for the night police station, the fight with a Leviathan, the hit of something very heavy on his head and the next moment Dean was waking up here in a what looked like an interrogation room, tied up to a chair.

"You son of a bitch!" Dean groaned angrily.

"Oh, you have no idea!" The Leviathan smiled when his face turned back and looked human again and then made several steps closer to the hunter. "And I'm getting hungry here."

"Why?" Dean suddenly blurred. "Why didn't you kill me earlier? Why didn't you kill him?" It was like protective reaction for Dean, trying to talk with an enemy, while his head was desperately searching for a way out.

"Oh, I just really wanted to play with my meal." The Leviathan grinned.

"So, you were 'playing' with Cas for the whole frigging month?"

"Oh no…" The monster shook his head. "I was keeping him simply to play with you, Dean," the bastard leaned closer to hunter's ear, "you two are just adorable to watch: all those emotions, all the pain you have caused to each other. You hearts are filled with angst and despair, and it going to make you two so tasty!" He hissed.

"I'm going to kill you, you bastard!" Dean groaned. "I swear!"

"Oh, I wish to see you try!" the Leviathan chuckled stepping back. "Although, thinking about it, I could add some more spices on this good looking meatstickle!" He said and moved toward the console under the screen wall, moving some levers and pressing several buttons, turning it on. The console beeped and came alive as several dozen blue lights flashed all over its surface.

"What the hell are you doing?" Dean inquired.

"Sound. This is going to need sound." The Leviathan grinned. "And now it is time to play!" He laughed.

"Play? What the fuck are you talking about? What are you going to do to him?" Dean yelled, desperately trying to move to weaken the ropes around him.

"It's not about what I'm going to do to him." The monster explained, his voice started to change in the middle of the phrase as his face shifted changing its features to more familiar lines of Dean's own face, "it's about what I'm going to do to you." The exact copy of Dean smiled and moved towards the exit of the room, leaving Dean alone.

In several moments the door to another room opened and the fake Dean entered it. Castiel raised his head and glanced at the Leviathan with a terrifying look. The whole his body started to shake visibly in fear as Castiel tried to back off further from the fake Dean, but unfortunately the wall stood behind him, preventing him from escaping.

"No…" He whispered. "It is too soon, it hurts, it hurts so much, please, give me more time… it is too soon!" He pleaded.

Dean had no idea what his friend was talking about, but he was sure it wasn't something good. "Cas!" He yelled as loud as he could, trying to tell him that the bastard who was currently with him in the room, wasn't the real Dean, but his friend couldn't hear him through the thick layer of the screen glass.

The fake Dean meanwhile came closer to the angel, making Castiel shrink and tremble in the corner. "Well, I decided to do it again, you know me, Cas." The fake Dean said making the hunter groan in anger as the tone of his pseud was so realistic and Dean-like. "Come on! That is what you wanted! You thought I'm blind, thought that I can't see. But all this time I knew it Cas, I knew you wanted it!"

"Dean, please…" Castiel sobbed. His voice sounded so miserable, that Dean's heart arched in his chest.

"You said that you want to redeem yourself, so that is how you're going to do it!" The flam Dean grinned, grabbing Castiel by his hair and tugging him up into a kneeling position.

The angel tried to resist, tried to get away from the Levia-Dean, but he was too weak. Dean could see how tears appeared on Castiel's eyes. "Come on! Do it!" The Leviathan ordered, tugging Castiel's face to his crotch.

The real Dean blinked not quite believing his eyes as Castiel's thin fingers started to unzip the fake hunter's fly, tugging his jeans down. Castiel sobbed once before he also pulled the layer of underwear down and without hesitation took the still limp and lifeless Levia-Dean's cock in his mouth.

First Dean's reaction was a shock, as he could never imagine anything like this happening to him, which if to look back on his life was surprising and astonishing. He was watching Castiel, his friend, sucking on a cock which maybe didn't belong to the hunter, but still was the exact replica of it. Dean suddenly started to feel like his skin became too small for him, like it was about to blow out exposing all hunter's emotions he had ever felt in his life at once. His mouth went dry and his lungs felt empty, like someone sucked out all the air from them, together with the air from the room as he wasn't even able to refill them. The pink chopped lips were working on fast hardening member unexpectedly skillful, Castiel's head were bobbing back and forward swallowing the replica of Dean's manhood nearly whole. Dean was pretty sure, that it wasn't possible to learn how to do it that well without practice. Who knew how many times it had happened before? How many times the Leviathan had come to the angel, making him please the bastard?

Dean swallowed an invisible limb stuck in his throat before a terrifying realization came into his mind. He, Dean Winchester, who for his entire life had slept with only women, who enjoyed nothing else, but soft lines and curves of their bodies, was turning on by a sight before his eyes. If Dean would have been extremely truthful with himself, he would of course admit that the idea of sex with another guy had been crossing his mind several times in his life, but all the times it had been nothing more than simple thoughts like 'what would it feel like' rather than actual fantasies about it. But seeing what Castiel was doing with this impostor sent light shivers through his entire nerve system making him doubt his own orientation.

But before his thought deepened any more, his eyes slipped from Castiel's mouth to his face. Angel's eyes were closed but even with this fact, the hunter could see tears running on the shorter man's cheeks, making any trace of amusement disappear from Dean's head. The hunter was finally able to take control over own mind shaking his stupor off.

And now it was the wave of anger rushing through him. The time seemed to stop for the hunter as the image before his eyes started to pulse with every heartbeat in his chest. Dean pulled up hard from his chair, ignoring the burn of the ropes around his wrists and ankles.

"I'm going to fucking kill you, you hear me?" He yelled. "I swear, you aren't going to survive this night!"

The fake Dean moaned loudly and glanced on the hunter trough the screen wall, winking. The glance missed Dean's face on several inches what only could mean that imposter couldn't see Dean from another side.

Dean tried to stop looking at what was going on behind the glass wall, looking instead around the room he was in and trying to find anything that could help him to get out from here, but the sounds coming from the other room were making it difficult to concentrate.

"All right, Cas, that enough, I'm hard enough already." The Levia-Dean sneered.

But the angel seemed like didn't hear the imposter, as he squeezed his eyes shot and continued to suck on the member, bobbing his head and trying to speed up.

"Didn't you hear what I said?" The fake Dean groaned, before pulling the angel away from himself by his hair and forcefully shoving him back to the corner. For a split second Dean decided that it was over now, that the Leviathan had enough fun showing the hunter what had he done with Castiel, but the scared look on angel's face convinced him otherwise.

"Did you try to finish me off by your mouth to escape the more interesting parts?" The Leviathan chuckled. "Sorry, but you aren't going to get around today."

With those words fake Dean made several steps towards the angel and kneeled before him starting to unbuckle his slacks and tug them down. If Castiel tried to resist at first, this time he simply covered his face with his palms, crying. The Levia-Dean meanwhile wasn't paying much attention on that. When the slacks and underwear were finally off, he grabbed the angel by his thin hips and positioned him more conveniently before roughly showing the full length of his member inside Castiel, neither lubricating it nor even preparing the angel. Castiel cried out in pain, shaking and trying to get away from the fake hunter, but the bastard was holding him in one place not even straining a muscle on his arms while trusting roughly in and out of the angel.

If Dean thought he was angry before, he was wrong. The blood inside his body seemed like boiling when he was watching his friend's face, making him more furious than he had ever been in his entire life.

"That is what you always wanted, Castiel? That is what you dreamed about?" The fake hunter murmured on Castiel's ear, thrusting faster and faster with every moment, not paying any attention on how much pain he was causing to the shorter man.

Dean turned his head from the sight starting to desperately looking around the room as he was and then his eyes suddenly spotted his own Swiss knife laying in the corner or the room. Dean had no idea how the knife got there but he didn't care. Dean glanced once again at the picture before him to determinate the approximate amount of time he had.

Castiel looked less in pain, but it was way far away from pleasure also. In fact his friend looked like he was about to lose it and fall unconscious. There of course wasn't anything that could make Dean angrier that he already was, but now he also became scared.

Trying to pull all the strength he had in his body, Dean started to jump across the room together with the chair he was tied up to. When he was finally in the other end of the room, he moved all his weight to one side to knock the chair down. He nearly hit his still aching head against the wall as the chair had been sent to a flight down, but for his luck the only one thing he hit was own shoulder. It hurtled like a bitch, of course but it was a really small price for an opportunity to finally getting himself free.

Reaching the knife from this angle was difficult and the hunter spent a whole minute, which seemed like several hours before he was finally able to grab the knife in his hand and starting to cut the ropes. Dean couldn't see what was going on behind the glass screen from the laying position, but according by the sounds the action was still going. Castiel became quieter than he was before. Dean wasn't sure why, but he really didn't want to know it. When the first rope had been cut, the process started to move quicker as he got one of his hands free, but he still was swearing under his nose as it felt way too long.

When Dean was finally free, he jumped from the floor and glanced at the screen. Castiel really became quieter, but the only reason behind it was the fact that the angel was now half laying limb on the floor, held in the imposter's arms. Dean groaned again, before reaching his bag the Leviathan left on the table. It was a deadly mistake for the bastard.

Everything after that happened very fast: after getting out to the corridor, Dean kicked the door to the next room open with his foot, rushing into it. The hunter saw the surprised face of his pseudo before the surprise had been washed with an air of pain as a content of the bottle the hunter was holding flushed all over the Leviathan.

"I told you, this night was going to be your last one, you son of a bitch!" He yelled, swinging a machete, cutting his fake head from Leviathan's shoulders.

The head fell on the floor, followed by the lifeless body, spilling black blood all over the room. Dean pushed the dead monster away from his friend who had been laying motionless on the floor.

Dean could have been very ashamed of seeing Castiel with no pants on, and of course he tried to not even give the view a single glance, avoiding his friend's bare ass, but then he noticed something that made the blood froze in his veins because there were actually red traces all over Castiel naked buttocks.

"Oh, no-no-no… Don't tell me it was that rough!" Dean groaned, leaning to his friend.

There really were situations when examining another's man ass was weird and awkward, but right now Dean was so much scared for Castiel, that he threw all this awkwardness away and carefully separated Castiel's buttock, swearing loud as he did, because the shorter man's passage looked terrible, swollen and bloody. It seemed as the Leviathan was doing this to the angel way too often, not caring about the pain he was causing.

Dean quickly pulled Castiel's slacks back and grabbed him on his arms. He was surprised how light the shorter man was, like he had been starving for all this time. And damn, for what Dean knew he really could. The hunter rushed through the empty police station to the exit, then quickly placed his unconscious friend on the back sit of his car, before quickly returning back, to clean the mess he left behind. Of course he knew that Castiel right now needed help, but he couldn't leave the Leviathan behind, because the bastard could regenerate, he could come back for the angel when the hunter wouldn't around, could steal the shorter man again.

Dean's blood still felt like boiling when he returned to the interrogation room, he had no idea what was going on with him as several moments later he found himself above the Leviathan's dead body, laying countless amount of blows with his machete on the corpse.

~ooo~

_The room Castiel woke up in was dark and he wasn't able to see a thing. It had never been a problem for the angel, because his grace was allowing him to see in the dark better than some animals could, and the fact that he was no longer able to do it, was indicating that his grace was no longer within him._

_The last thing the angel remembered was the moment he walked into the water in the reservoir of Sioux Falls. Then the reality slipped away from him, until this moment. Castiel wasn't sure how much time passed after his body had been torn apart, he didn't know how long had he spent here._

_The place was not only dark, but also reeking with a terrible stench of moll, fish and decay and it was making him sick on the stomach. It was also something he hadn't used to as an angel. It wasn't like Castiel couldn't smell anything before possessing a human vessel, it was that he could block anything uncomfortable whenever he wanted and right now no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't do anything with the terrible smell around him._

_Castiel tried to move around the room by touch, crawling slowly against a dump wall till he was able to find a stone-like staircase leading to a heavy wooden door which was locked. He didn't have his powers, he had nothing to unlock the door with and he was too weak for trying to break it, so he had nothing else left as return down and wait._

_The angel had no idea how much time he had spent here, cold and hungry. It seemed like several days passed by, but Castiel couldn't tell exactly how many, because he wasn't able to see the sun and distinguish a night from a day. The terrible smell seemed to stop bothering him as much as at the beginning, but the angel knew that it wasn't because the stench disappeared, but because human bodies had the protective mechanism of adaptation._

_Castiel was praying. At first he prayed to his father. He wasn't trying to find forgiveness, not after everything he had done, but he was asking for a chance to redeem himself, to become a better person and do everything he could to fix the mess he made. But heaven was silent. Not knowing what else to do, Castiel started to pray to the one single person in the world who could help him – Dean Winchester._

_And finally, after what seemed to the angel like three or four days, his prayers was heard, as the door opened, making him squeeze his eyes as the bright light coming from in was blinding him. When he was able to adjust and looked back on the doorway, he saw a silhouette of a man who was so familiar for the angel that he felt as a wave of happiness rushed through his entire body._

_"Cas?" A familiar voice called his name._

_"Dean…" The angel whispered as he was not able to make his voice sound anything loudly that a simple whisper._

_The taller man rushed towards the angel, grabbing him in an embrace, pressing him close to himself. "Cas… you bastard… I have been worrying so much!" He exhaled._

_Castiel went stiff in hunter's arms, not quite believing how close they were, but then relaxed enjoying the warm body pressed against his, exhaling Dean's smell. For some weird reasons Dean smelt like morass and fish, but Castiel was just too happy to pay any attention on that. All what mattered to him that now he was safe._

_"Let's go Cas, I will take you away from here." Dean whispered on the angel's ear. "Everything will be different from now on."_

_Castiel smiled and nodded awkwardly, the words he heard from Dean was so soft, filled with care and he didn't want anything else but hear those words again and again._

_Again and again…_


	2. Chapter 2

**Part 2**

Castiel shut his eyes open, as he woke up. His heart was beating hard in his chest and his whole body was covered in sweat. He was laying as still as he only could, trying to catch his breath and estimate his surroundings. The first thing he realized is that the pain in the lover part of his body he had already used to feel for a month was now less notable. He couldn't say that it was totally gone, but at least now it was more or less bearable. The second thing Castiel noticed was the fact that the terrible reek of fish and decay was now gone, replaced by more pleasant smell of lavender coming from very soft pillow under his head and a blanket wrapped around him.

The angel looked around and found himself in an unfamiliar place, laying on a small but very comfortable bed, although after sleeping for so long on a cold floor, everything seemed more comfortable for the angel. The room was dim, but it had a small window in a wooden wall, lidding it and Castiel was able to see everything around. The place he found himself in looked like a cabin and according by green trees behind the window and songs of birds, he assumed that the cabin was situated somewhere in a forest. There wasn't much furniture around, only the bed he was laying in a night stand next to the bed, a drip stand with an IV set connected to angel's arm and a chair with a sleeping figure on it.

The heart seemed to stop in Castiel's chest as he recognized the person because it was the man who for the last month had been the reason of Castiel's pain and despair – Dean. Castiel felt like his whole body started to shiver in terror once again only by being with Dean in one room. His brain was telling him, that something was off this time that situation wasn't usual, but he really couldn't stop the shiver.

Castiel froze on the bed, afraid to even breathe as it could wake Dean up. His gaze moved towards the door open crack and then back to the hunter. It was his chance to escape, his last hope. Castiel had no idea what would he do outside where will he go, but right now everything seemed like a better idea.

He carefully extracted the needle from his vein, hissing quietly at the pain it caused and carefully threw the blanked off. When nothing was covering him, he noticed that something else was different. He wasn't wearing his usual clothes, but a clean comfortable sweatpants and a tee shirt which looked like Dean's. That was very weird, because Dean had never allowed the angel to wear any of his clothes as he never allowed him to sleep on a bed. Castiel would think that everything that had happened to him last month was nothing more but a terrible nightmare, but in this case, why it had to be a cabin in the forest and not Bobby's house Dean brought him into? Plus the slight movement made his insides to ache terribly, so it was anything but a dream.

Castiel tried to sit on the bed, but the new position caused another weave of pain from his lower body, making him hiss and turn on the side. One of his legs accidentally brushed against the dripper stand, pushing it and sending it into a flight to the floor. Castiel watched his only way to escape slipping away with an inside scream, there wasn't a single chance the hunter wasn't able to hear it.

Dean shot his eyes open the moment he heard the sound of something falling on the floor. The first thing he spotted was Castiel awkwardly sitting on the edge of the bed and starring at the hunter with terrifying eyes. When the angel noticed Dean waking up, he slid from the bed, trying to stand, but his legs appeared to be too weak and the shorter man fell on the floor on his ass, squeaking of sudden pain and trying to turn on his stomach.

"Cas!" Dean exhaled rushing to his friend, but his actions seemed to make things even worse as Castiel suddenly started to scream curling himself on the floor trying to hide his face in his palms. "Whoo-wo-wo!" Dean yelped raising his hands in the air "Cas! I'm not touching you! Dude, relax!"

But the angel seemed not to pay any attention to Dean, shaking hard and trying to climb under the bed.

"Castiel!" Dean yelled, trying to reach angel's state of awareness.

This time it worked better and the angel looked back on the hunter still shaking and scared.

"Not touching you! You hear me, Cas! Not even coming close to you!" Dean repeated as he made a step back.

Castiel blinked but didn't reply.

Hearing the noises and screaming Sam and Bobby appeared on the door way but was prevented from entering the room by Dean who made a step towards the door and gestured them to back off.

"Cas. You're safe! You hear me!" Dean continued. "It wasn't me… all this time it wasn't me, it was the Leviathan!"

The angel inhaled sharply, then moved his glance from the hunter to the doorway where the other two men were still standing just in case and then back to Dean. "Leviathan?" He asked, like trying to taste the word on his tongue.

"Yes! They can turn into other people, like shape shifters!" Dean quickly explained. "I killed him, Cas! You're safe now!"

Castiel seemed like calmed down, trying to proceed everything Dean told him but still not taking his eyes away from the hunter and not moving like he was afraid that Dean could jump on him unexpectedly. "D… Dean?" he finally announced with a surprised tone.

"Yeah, yeah. It's me. Real me, Cas!" Dean confirmed. "All right, you really should return to bed and rest some more." He said and made several steps towards the angel.

It was his mistake as Castiel shrank back into a defensive pose on the ground starring at Dean terrified, trying to back away as much as he could.

"God dammit!" Dean swore backing off. "Sammy… or Bobby, can you help him climbing back on the bad? I don't think he will let me any closer."

Both hunters entered the room and moved closer to Castiel. The angel was still watching them suspiciously, but at least he accepted their help and was finally placed back in the bed.

"All right." Bobby nodded. "It seems that now he will be able to eat something by himself and the dripper is no longer needed. He looks way better than yesterday, although he seems to still having a slight fever." The old hunter explained when they finally finished their task. "You're not going to do anything stupid, son?" Bobby turned to the angel.

Castiel blinked looking at Bobby and shook his head.

"Good." Bobby nodded. "I will go and warm up some chicken soup then."

With those words Bobby left the room, tugging the younger Winchester with him. It really looked like the two of other hunters were trying to leave Dean and Castiel alone, probably they thought that the two of them had stuff to discuss, but Dean had no Idea what could he possibly talk with Castiel about. It was not like there was anything to discuss, because yeah, shit happened. Castiel had been raped by a freaking Leviathan, but it was not like Dean could give any kind of psychological help in this situation. In fact if Dean would appear on angel's place, talking was the last thing in the world he would want.

"Ok…" Dean sighed. "I will… go and check on my brother and Bobby. And you… you just relax and try to have some rest." He said bluntly and rushed from the room feeling terribly uncomfortable and nearly blushing.

~ooo~

Last night Dean really hoped to sneak inside the cabin not waking anyone up, but his luck had unfortunately turned away from him as the hunter had been met by both, his brother and Bobby who got outside and had been throwing angry looks in Dean's direction. Although, when they saw Dean carrying Castiel in his arms, the anger in their eyes had changed into concern and then worry.

Dean really hadn't wanted to see anyone that moment as he hadn't wanted to explain anything to two other hunters. With some sort of miracle he had convinced Bobby to return back to bed while sending Sam to a pharmacy as the angel had visible evidences of starvation and had been unconscious to eat on own accord and the only thing they had for current situation was one injection of glucose.

Dean had carefully undressed his friend and cleaned him in a small bathtub in warm water – well it hadn't been like he never seen him naked by this point. Then he had dressed him in own clothes and laid onto Dean's own bed, trying not to think about anything which had been actually pretty easy if to consider how tired the hunter was. That night he had to take care of the person who had become like a brother to the hunter and the time to think about his betrayal or freak about everything happened the night before had only come this morning.

"So, care to enlighten us and tell what happened to the guy?" Bobby inquired standing behind the kitchen counter and not even turning to face Dean.

The older Winchester shifted on his chair. It seemed that neither Sam nor Bobby understood a thing and it was for the best. The hunter couldn't even imagine what had the angel passed though during that month, how terrible things had turned to him. It wasn't something one could forget and move one it was going to be a black trace haunting Castiel all his life and less people would know about it, was better. Dean himself should probably never mention to Castiel that he knew and moreover saw everything with own eyes and couldn't do a thing. He couldn't do a thing for a whole month, because he even had never tried to look for the angel at the first place, thinking that he was dead.

"No." Dean simply replied.

"Dean, you ran away in the middle of the night, you risked own life just leaving us behind!" His brother who was sitting silently the whole morning, flared out. "You could die there! You could…"

"And what?" Dean interrupted "May be I deserved it, after all the shit I've done?"

Sam glanced at the older brother and sighed. "Never mind..." He shook his head and stood from the table. "I will go and breath some fresh air" He announced before opening the door to leave the cabin and nearly knocked down sheriff Mills who appeared in the door way at the same moment he opened it. Sam bluntly apologized and maneuvered around the sheriff disappearing from Dean's view.

"Is everything all right with him?" The sheriff asked.

"He'll be fine!" Dean replied.

May be his reassurance didn't look anyhow reassuring, but Jodie as it seemed understood that it wasn't the best thing to discuss, so she simply walked closer to the table and placed several sheets of paper on it.

"Here are the results of the blood test you asked me to do." She announced with a sigh. "There is a sign of tumefaction in his organism, like it happens if you injured in unsanitary environment."

"Tumefaction? You said the guy was starved to this condition…" Bobby surprised.

Dean glanced at the older hunter but didn't reply anything.

"There is also all the signs of starvation as well. But it's not critical." Jodie added.

"Nothing else?" Dean inquired. He was really afraid that the son of a bitch the Leviathan was could easly gift the angel with some sort of infection. That was the reason he asked the sheriff to take the blood sample at the first place.

"No, other than that he is perfectly normal." Sheriff shook her head.

"Perfectly normal…" Dean mumbled though clenched teeth because Castiel was anything but normal. Well, he used to be at least.

"Anyway," Jodie continued, "It's nothing too serious and a week on antibiotics should do it, but the doctor who made the test said that it will be way better to get him to a hospital, just in case."

"He isn't going anywhere." Dean refused not even thinking about it.

"Why is that suddenly such a problem?" Bobby inquired. "What really happened there? Why is that such a secret? Cause you know, he didn't look injured to me."

"I said nothing happened!" Dean groaned. "Can you please cut it off already?"

Both the sheriff and Bobby glanced at him askance, but didn't comment. It was possible that the older hunter started to conjecture things, and his guesses even might have been right, but it still were two different things - to know and to guess. Castiel had suffered enough physically and Dean didn't want to also dishonor his friend by telling everyone around about things the Leviathan did to him.

Of course his overprotective behavior didn't mean that Dean forgave the angel totally. Castiel had done a lot of stupid things, he even had been threatening to kill the three hunters and he broke the wall in Sam's head. But from another side – his brother was ok. Of course at first it had been difficult, but he really was better now; without any walls in his head, he even became stronger. So may be there wasn't actually anything so terrible in the fact that Castiel did it? And about working with Crowley? To tell the truth Dean had never blamed Castiel for it, the thing which made Dean angry was the fact that Castiel had never come to him for help, that he chose a demon over him, like Sam once did. The angel tried to save the goddamn world once again, he just choose the wrong way to do it. But it didn't mean Dean would never forgive him, because Castiel was a family, nearly Winchester.

"All right, let it be your way." The older hunter agreed. "Take the soup to him than." He added nodding at the bowl he prepared.

"Me? Why me?" Dean surprised.

"And who should do it then? Me? Or maybe Jodie?"

The last thing in the world Dean wanted to do right now was to return in the room to Castiel, to see his scared eyes piercing the hunter, making him feel like his soul was turning from inside out under the angel's gaze, to think about what Castiel was seeing in the hunter every time his blues eyes were fixing on the taller man. But if Dean would refuse it, Bobby would get even more suspicious, or might start asking yet another round of questions Dean really had no intention on answering.

Dean swore in his mind and picked the bowl of soup before disappearing into another room.

~ooo~

Castiel was laying still, wrapped in a cozy blanked afraid to move. He felt like he slept for many hours, but still he was so very tired, like if the last time he slept had been days ago. Every time he was trying to turn his head, the room was starting to spin before his eyes and nauseous spasm kept flushing trough his stomach. The only one thing which was preventing him from throwing up was a fact that his stomach was empty.

Castiel heard Sam Dean and Bobby arguing over something, but the sound were muffled by a closed door and he wasn't able to hear what exactly they were talking about, but something was telling him that it was him they were discussing. Castiel had no idea what he supposed to do. Most of all he wanted to disappear right now, to fly away and never return to Earth, because of shame and pain this place caused him, because of everything Dean did to him.

No, not Dean – the Leviathan.

Castiel wasn't stupid; he started to get suspicious because it had really been something wrong with Dean he used to be with for the last month. At first Castiel really wanted to believe that this person was really Dean, before he started to do those… things. And then Castiel simply didn't know what to think and what to believe. He hadn't been allowed to go anywhere, to watch TV or even read, he had no idea what was going on with the outside world and the only one source of information was that Dean. And the things he had been telling to the angel, the things happened to the world because of the angel.

But that Dean wasn't real, and all this time he had been lying to make the angel feel even worse than he had already felt, condemning self the whole month.

But what if that was actually true? That everything that was going on with Castiel right now was just a dream? Or what if Dean whom he saw earlier today, who right now was in other room, wasn't real? What if it was just a trick to make Castiel feel safe again, before starting to continue the torture?

His thought was disturbed by the sound of the door opening slowly, like the person on another side didn't want to open it at the first place and was trying to take as much time as he could. Castiel glanced at the doorway, trying not to move his head and felt how his heart started to beat in his chest so fact that alone was making him feel like he was about to lose his consciousness once again.

"Hey…" Dean called in a whisper. The hunter looked very uncomfortable holding a bowl with something in his hands and switching his glance from the ceramic dishware to the angel and back. "Brought you soup…" He explained like he was trying to explain some sort of terrible action.

Castiel knew that he had to answer something but not a single word could escape his mouth, like someone deprived him of the ability to speak.

"Is it ok if I come closer?" Dean asked tentatively.

Castiel blinked several times fixing his eyes on the hunter and then slowly nodded. Dean took a deep breath before making several steps towards his friend.

Castiel's heart started to beat even faster in his chest. He perfectly knew that this reaction was very unreasonable but he couldn't control it anyhow. He was watching every step of the hunter like he could turn into a monster any second, but for what Castiel knew it really could happen.

Dean as it seemed noticed angel's concern and stopped in the middle of the room. "Listen, I understand everything… well, not really, but I'm trying, but damn, you really need to eat!" He said with a sigh. "So I'm going to just leave the soup on the nightstand and you will eat it. Deal?"

Castiel nodded yet again and the hunter continued his way towards the bed the angel was currently occupying. The shorter man was trying hard to calm himself down, but it was more difficult than he could imagine. He was trying to convince himself that even if he shouldn't trust this Dean, he at least could pretend that he did, that it might help him in any ways, but the heart in his chest was not under his control, not anymore. He used to being able to control all the body processes before, like Dean was controlling his Impala while driving, but now his vessel seemed to live its own life not asking Castiel for any sort of permissions. It was actually even ironic if to consider the fact how much connected he was with his vessel right now.

"It's not much," Dean mumbled as he finally reached the nightstand placing the bowl onto it, "but Sam said that you shouldn't eat much right after you've been starving for long, cause of some health crap." He explained like he was trying to justify the lack of better food.

Sam. Castiel felt like something comforting touched him from inside. For all this month he was considering the younger Winchester dead, because the Leviathan told him so, but apparently Sam was all right. At least that what Castiel assumed after seeing him today. The angel noticed how his lungs distended in a sigh of relief even before his brain could precede the good news.

Dean meanwhile finished with his task and hurried to leave the angel alone, for what Castiel was very thankful, because in an accord to eat the angel had to switch his position in a more or less sitting. Of course he still didn't want to trust this Dean, but if there was any miserable chance that this hunter was the real one, he could see how painful it was to sit for the angel and Castiel really didn't want him to know. He wasn't sure why, it wasn't like he used to pay a lot of attention to human physiology before or to human moral norms of sharing something on this topic, it was just he didn't want Dean to see him this way.

When Castiel had finally been left alone, he took a deep breath lifting his body up and trying to be as much unruffled as he only could. When he was finally in a half sitting position, the pain struck him with a new wave and he had to wait a moment before reaching for the bowl with a soup and bringing it closer to himself.

Castiel really didn't want to eat. Not because he wasn't hungry, because he clearly was, but because the process of consuming food seemed for him slightly filthy. It also wasn't like he had never been eating at all during this month. From time to time the other Dean had been bringing him food to simply keep him alive, but those moments were rare and the food he had been bringing was disgusting and unpleasant and had always smelt like fish. At first Castiel had been refusing it, he hoped that if he wouldn't eat he would be able to die, to stop those suffering, but the death from hunger appeared to be too long and agonizing so he started to consume what he had been given.

The pleasant smell of the soup reached angel's nostrils making his stomach growl. The soup consisted mostly from the clear broth, but there also were little pieces of boiled chicken and something which Castiel determined as carrots; all of them were cut into very small pieces to make the substance more comfortable for drinking. Castiel inhaled the pleasant odor of the liquid once again before finally giving up and making the first sip.

The soup was surprisingly good. Castiel of course never tried much food to compare tastes but after a month of hunger the soup seemed to him like the most pleasurable thing in the world. The warmth of the liquid spread over his body caressing him gently and making the angel relaxed. Castiel's suddenly heard his vessel making a moaning sound without his control, but this time he took it as a good sign before leaning to the bowl once again and drinking the soup greedily filling his stomach with its pleasant warmth.

When the bowl was empty, Castiel returned it on the nightstand and sunk back into the bed, trying to ignore the pain from the movement as much as he could. For some reasons now he felt very calm even when the all fibers of his common sense were telling him otherwise, were telling him that he shouldn't give in into this contrived reality, because it was too good to be true. Castiel just needed to rest some more, to close his eyes for several more moments before returning into the condition of full awareness and not pay attention of how cozy this bed was, how pleasant it smelt and how good was the feeling of having something in his stomach, so he did.

~ooo~

_It had been a late night hour when Dean parked his car nearly some sort of an empty building and got out from it, stretching his limbs and looking around._

_"Why are we here, Dean?" Castiel asked following him out from the car._

_"Hiding." The hunter replied as this one word was the answer to any question Castiel had._

_Castiel wanted to ask why they didn't return to Bobby's why they had to hide in a place which looked like an abandoned warehouse in the middle of nowhere - there was nothing around in many miles, just open fields and forest, but he was too afraid to ask more questions feeling as he wasn't allowed to because of what he had done in the past. If Dean thought that it would be the best place for them to stay for the night, so Castiel would follow him. He would follow Dean into the end of the world once again if he needed to; he would die for him, so why to question his decisions on something minor like that?_

_"We will spend here several days before moving further." Dean added smiling. There were something off with this smile, it was cold and looked more like a grin, but Castiel decided that it were just his imagination and the lack of illumination playing stupid jokes with him._

_The angel simply nodded and followed the hunter inside the empty building._

_The warehouse from inside looked even worse than from outside. Some part of the roof was ruined and the angel could see sky from the holes in it, the windows on the walls were broken, some of them were patched with polyethylene sheets but even those sheets had been already cut and torn. The floor was littered with all sort of trash starting from any kind of architectural debris to old dirty clothes which Castiel had no idea how they could appear here. The air around was reeking with all sort of terrible smells starting with already too familiar stench of fish and ending with fetor of urine coming from the dirty clothes spread all over the floor._

_They moved from one room to another and Castiel found himself in a place he wasn't able to see anything in. He heard some sort of clicking noise behind his back and the room suddenly lid up with the only one light bulb hanging from the ceiling. This room looked surprisingly cleaner that the rest of the building. There still was this terrible stench, but at least he was less notable and all the trash and debris had been removed from the floor._

_In the right corner of the room was a single bed with no matrass, but a metal net pulled between its frame and several old wooden chairs on the other side. Other than that the room was empty._

_"Not a royal apartment, but it will do." Dean smirked. "Take a seat."_

_Castiel obeyed the hunter and sat on the edge of the old bed. The metal net squeaked and sagged under the angel weight._

_"There, I don't need you die of hunger." Dean explained as he extracted a plastic bag from his duffel and threw it onto angel's knees._

_Castiel opened the bag and found something which looked like orts from a cheap caff. It was cold and greasy and really unsavory, but Castiel had no other choice, he knew that without his grace he wasn't able to sustain his vessel's needs and food was the only one way for him to survive, so he dag into the orts trying to consume as much of it as he only could, ignoring the fact how unpleasant it felt in his month._

_The whole this time Dean wasn't tearing his gaze from the fallen angel. Usually Castiel wouldn't even notice it, but this time there was something very unusual in Dean's eyes, some sort of hunger and curiosity at the same time. The angel slowly started to feel uncomfortable under the intent stare, but he didn't dare to say anything._

_When the meal was over Dean suddenly made several steps towards the shorter man and grabbing him by the lapels of his jacket, lifted him up in a standing position._

_"Dean?" Castiel surprised feeling as his heart started to beat faster in his chest._

_But Dean didn't reply. With a single motion of his hands he tore Castiel's shirt apart, making the angel squint in surprise and started to place hungry kisses on his neck and chest._

_Castiel was standing still afraid to move a single inch. He was surprised by Dean's action and didn't know how to react, but at the same time he was simply afraid that the hunter could stop, could push the angel away and say that it was a mistake to do it, an ill-considered action. But Dean didn't – moreover he was all over him, kissing his skin which felt like burning under every touch of hunter's lips; Dean's hands took a hold on Castiel's hips, keeping him on one place, like the taller man was afraid that the angel could move away. Of course Dean was wrong, he didn't need to hold Castiel, he could have all of him, he could do with him anything he wanted, because Castiel was ready to give the hunter anything, and not even because of guild and remorse he felt, but because he wanted it, he wanted it for so long already, but was too afraid to ask, he was afraid that Dean could deny him. Angel's head felt like spinning around to fast, making his legs weaker like they wasn't able to hold the angel upright anymore, the entire world seemed to lose its importance because there wasn't anything else left in it but Dean's touches._

_The sudden burst of sharp pain on angel's shoulder made Castiel return back to reality. He buckled away from the hunter trying to look in his eyes, but his legs tripped over the edge of the bed and he fell down on it. Dean made one more step closer licking blood from his lips and grinning wide and Castiel felt like a wave of fright washed over him._

_"Dean?" He pleaded in a broken voice._

_But the hunter wasn't listening. He leaned closer to the angel placing his hands on his shoulder and keeping him still._

_"Better than I even could imagine." He whispered on Castiel's ear._


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3**

Castiel woke up cowered in sweat and breathing heavy. The traces of the nightmare were still fresh in his mind and it was difficult to concentrate. The angel still couldn't understand what was real and what wasn't; the world around him was like separated into two parts and he was flying somewhere in the middle.

"Hey, Cas…" He heard a familiar voice next to his bed and turned his head, which surprisingly still didn't quite understand where the angel was, but at least it wasn't aching and the dizziness was nearly gone. "Did I wake you up?" The voice asked.

Castiel fixed his eyes on a figure in which he recognized Sam. Several strong emotions suddenly filled the angel and he wasn't sure which one seemed most appropriate for the situation. First - he realized that everything what happened moments ago wasn't real, it was simply his memories returning to him in a form of a nightmare and it made the angel feel somewhat relieved. Second - he was simply glad to see the younger Winchester alive and what more important – fine. But at the same time a strong feeling of guilt settled in the bottom of his stomach clenching on him from inside and making him feel sick.

"I brought you breakfast." Sam explained as he handed the angel a plate with something white and mushy. With a mention of food, Castiel's stomach suddenly stared to growl, asking the angel to give up his diffidence and accept the plate with something which under closer examination looked really uneatable.

"Umm…" Castiel emitted looking at the weird mushy substance.

"Oh, please tell me that you not going to play Dean and refuse eating anything which looks even slightly weird." Sam groaned. "It's just oat flakes porridge. It's not that bad!"

Castiel tore his gaze from the plate and gave Sam a peery glance, before digging into his meal. The thing was terrible. And it wasn't about the taste, because surprisingly it tasted not that bad especially with a fact that there was a bunch of small fruit pieces mixed with it. But the consistence was just disgusting: sticky and slick it suddenly started to remind the angel… not he wasn't going to think about it right now. Castiel sighed and started to devour the porridge as fast as he could trying to swallow it before he could feel anything.

"It was revolting..." Castiel concluded when he finally finished his breakfast.

Sam gifted Castiel with an amused look, but didn't comment anything. "Going to give you an antibiotic shot now, please don't freak out." He simply informed extracting a syringe and a needle from a first aid kit he brought with him.

Sam really expected the angel to react somehow terrified seeing a needle, but Castiel simply stretched out his arm allowing the younger hunter to reach to his vein, watching his every move as the needle pierced his skin. Sam knew that the angel had been tortured and was sure something like this could make the angel at least nervous to see if not to summon another round of screams and shakings. But Castiel was calm. Together with the fact Dean was as silent as a fish, it looked very suspicious, but Sam decided not to think about it right now. If both, his older brother and the angel didn't want to talk about it yet, it was their right.

"All right!" Sam announced cheerfully as he finished with his task. "All done."

He was about to stand up from the edge of the bed he was sitting on and leave the room, as Castiel suddenly called him. Sam turned his head back and was met with one of Castiel's confused looks. It was like the angel wanted to say something, but hesitated.

"Yes?" Sam asked, trying to encourage Castiel to conversation.

"Sam…" Castiel repeated the younger hunter's name and moved his gaze down looking on a white blanket like it suddenly became the most remarkable thing in the room. "Is it… is it really you?" He finally asked.

"Yeah, well." The younger Winchester nodded. "I know it may be still difficult to believe for you, but I swear, it's really me."

Castiel sighed closing his eyes. For a moment he was absolutely still and silent, but then he turned his head and looked back at Sam. "I'm sorry…" he whispered quietly.

Sam was sure that it would be difficult to forgive Castiel after everything he had done, after he used the younger Winchester to distract Dean and broke the wall in his head; he thought that he would be angry at the angel, but surprisingly he just couldn't find anything like that among his emotions. In his own experience there had been moments when he was making wrong decisions with only good intentions. He simply felt like he had no rights to judge the angel.

"It's ok, Cas, really," Sam smiled. "Everything turned to not that bad, as it seemed. At least with my wall. To tell the truth I'm grateful that I don't have it anymore." He admitted.

"You're too kind." Castiel said.

"Hey, that is what family for!" Sam nodded and placed his palm on angel's shoulder.

Suddenly Castiel jerked trying to get away from the touch and then winced from pain.

"Cas?" Sam called. "You ok?"

"Yes." The angel responded. "Sorry, I still can't get used to… to this."

"To touches?" Sam raised his eyebrows, waiting Castiel to respond, but the angel was silent. Sam could swear he saw a light blush cowered angel's cheeks. "Do you want to talk about it?" Sam inquired.

"No!" Castiel cut off and if Sam wasn't sure he saw blush on angel's cheeks before, so now it definitely was there.

"All right…" Sam nodded. If he had been slightly suspicious before, now the pieces of a puzzle started to combine in his head. His guess still looked very ridiculous and unbelievable, but for now it was the only legit explanation of Dean and Castiel's behavior. This thought suddenly made a weave of empathy and condolence wash through his mind. "You want me to leave you for now?" He asked.

"Yes." Castiel replied. "No!" He added suddenly.

Sam frowned in confusion when he caught another pitiful expression on Castiel's face.

"I need…" The angel started like he was about to tell Sam something extremely embarrassing. "I need to use bathroom…" He admitted after a moment of hesitation, blushing even more than before.

~ooo~

Dean was trying to do his best to banish his memories away. He had already tried to watch any sort of drama on TV, he had tried to drink himself into the oblivion and even work some on his baby, polishing her black sides for already fifth time, but it hadn't worked (the banishing of the memories part, because polishing the car was something Dean could perform even while being very drunk). Every time the hunter was closing his eyes he saw the Leviathan copy of himself doing terrible things to his friend. The alcohol part actually not only didn't help the situation, but made it even worse as the terrible memories started to turn into not so much terrible fantasies including himself and Castiel. Dean had started to imagine himself on the place of his imposter, but instead of torturing he was caring and gentle with the angel and the angel was responding to every hunter's touch not with tearful gases, but with passion.

Dean was wondering why had his drunk brain decided to go this way, because the hunter clearly wasn't a gay or something, he was perfectly straight and interested in only boobs in any forms was it real boobs of real girls or glance paper ones shining bright from the pages of his favorite magazines. But the problem here wasn't in the orientation, Dean was simply angry at the whole situation, at the fact that first Castiel's experience with sexual activities had been not as it should have been and moreover that it was Dean's face (and other parts) the angel saw participating in the said experience. It was some sort of a blow below the belt for hunter's pride, because neither his face nor his other parts should ever associate with pain and humiliation but only with pleasure and satisfaction, both physical and moral. No wonder why his drunken mind decided to generate the ideas about proving Castiel wrong.

Right now Dean was laying still on a couch with his gaze glued to the wooden ceiling. He wasn't tired and wouldn't be able to sleep even he would try, and he was bored, but with a fact he was still smashed from the bottle of Jack Daniels he couldn't allow himself to drive anywhere (not because he was a responsible person who knew what kind of bad shit could happen if one would drive drunk, but simply because Bobby was sitting in the same room and he would shot the younger hunter with a round of salt if he was to make a single move in attempt to climb on the driver seat of the Impala. And, even if Dean could actually sneak to his baby and drive away while Bobby had his guard down, the older hunter would surely shot him after Dean's return.)

Dean also found himself in a weird situation: from one side he didn't want to go anywhere near Castiel, because every time the angel was in his sight, Dean's head was trying even harder to summon all those weird fantasies and it was sort of disturbing for the hunter. No, not sort of, it was _**really **_disturbing for him. But from another side after several hour of laying on a couch and not doing a thing, after several hours the angel had been out of Dean's sight, the hunter found himself nearly urging to rush to the other room to simply check if his friend was doing ok, and that was even more disturbing for Dean, because if he actually could coexist with the fact he found himself wanting to prove the angel how awesome sex with him could be, the sudden urge of simply stay close to his friend was way to alien.

Dean saw his younger brother disappearing in Castiel's room several minutes ago with a plate of the most terrible thing the humanity could create – the oat porridge. Dean had no idea why his brother decided to torture the angel with this terrible thing after all other kinds of torture Castiel was unfortunate to experience.

In approximately five or six minutes Sam spent in the bedroom, the door opened and the younger Winchester emerged from it with an angel arm wrapped around his shoulder and the angel himself toddling awkwardly next to him leaning on Sam in a search of support. Together they moved through the cabin's main room and disappeared outside. Dean couldn't hold himself and got up from the couch walking casually to the kitchen area and stopping suddenly in the middle as he decided to stretch his limbs, raising his hands up in the air and yawning. By a coincidence the spot he chose to perform this stretching happened to be right in front of the window which allowed him (also by a simple coincidence) to spot Sam leading Castiel to a wooden toilet across the small yard. After that Dean continued his way to a table in the kitchen area and sat on a chair next to Bobby.

"And how long are you going to play this game?" asked Bobby, who was watching Dean's little performance with an amused frown. Because only Bobby could frown in amusement.

"Have no idea what are you talking about." Dean smirked.

"Listen, boy, if you don't want to talk about what happened with Feathers, no-one makes you to, but don't pull all this crap on me."

"What crap?"

Bobby frowned yet again, but this time there was nothing amused in the frown: "You care about the idiot, and you've already managed to forgive him because this is who you are, but why the hell you're still trying to pretend otherwise?" He asked.

"And what is your suggestion? That I should stick around him every second from now on?"

"If it will help you, so yes, maybe you should!"

"What else? Feed him with a spoon, sing him lullabies every night and cuddle when he sleeps?"

"Oh, if _**this **_is what you want…" Bobby frowned with a sneer. Because it was only Bobby who could frown not only with amusement but with a sneer as well.

"Shut up…" Dean groaned and stood from the table to return to the couch.

If Dean would have been less angry right now, he would think about the fact that the whole his travel to the kitchen was totally pointless, but as his mind was currently veiled, he simply didn't notice it.

~ooo~

It had been several days Castiel spent with the three hunters. The inner fright the angel had at the beginning slowly started to fade down, replaced by a feeling of calm and safety even if he still didn't want trust them as much as he had used to around two years ago.

The pain in his body also started to calm down and, in a matter of days, he was able to stand up on his own and walk around the room. It didn't disappear totally of course and every step was causing new bursts of throbbing, plus every time Castiel had to satisfy the needs of his digestion system it was like a torture all over again, but it still was way better than four days before.

The poor and unsubstantial food slowly started to turn into more rich and tasty. At the end of the fourth day Castiel had even been allowed to eat a piece of baked red meat, which seemed to him as the tastiest thing in the whole world one could try. The other morning he even found a piece of an apple pie on the night stand next to the bed left there by Dean. There weren't any identification, like a note, that it had been Dean who brought it of course, Castiel just knew it.

The apple pie tasted not as good as a piece of red meat, but it was the best thing in the world anyway, because Dean left it for him.

At the same time this piece of pie was like a single prove of the fact that Dean Winchester still existed in angel's life, because otherwise Castiel saw him so rarely that it seemed like Dean was trying to avoid him. To tell the truth, Castiel actually knew that it exactly was the reason, and to tell another truth it also was totally fine by the angel, because every time he appeared in the same room with Dean, he couldn't stop panicking. It was simply out of his control. Although even his panic was now more silent. He stopped to shake and try to run away every time the older Winchester was somewhere at his sight.

The nightmares were still visiting him every time he was falling asleep. First two nights Castiel had been waking up screaming and cowered in sweat, but later he learned to distinguish the dream from reality and even if the nightmares had been still waking him up in the middle of the night, he at least regained enough control not to end up waking up the other three cohabiters with his screams.

Castiel's nightmares had been absolutely same during those several days. It had always been the Leviathan doing all this things to the angel. Castiel dreamed about how they had moved from the dirty warehouse the next morning after they spent their first night together (it had been really a terrible experience, it hurtled very much and the whole Castiel's body had been aching for the next several days.) Then the fake Dean had repeated everything all over again, while being even rougher than the first time. They were traveling around the country for the whole month and the angel had no idea where exactly they were each time they had been stopping somewhere for the night.

Once the shorter man managed to run away, but his freedom was so short, that he even had no time to register the fact that he wasn't around his offender. The night after being found and recaptured had been the first time Castiel was beaten.

~ooo~

This night Castiel woke up not because of a nightmare but because he simply felt someone watching him. The angel opened his eyes and spotted a figure in the dark room sitting on the edge of his bed half lid with moonlight soaking through the window. Castiel was about to start panicking but he decided to calm himself down as the room he woke up was diffidently the one he had used to fall asleep for the last several days: it still was the same wooden cabin in the middle of a forest, so there shouldn't be anything that could harm him, or at least that was what he hoped for.

The figure had wide shoulders and short hair and most likely belonged to a man, whose face was still in the dark, but Castiel was able recognize this silhouette anywhere - it was Dean Winchester. The hunter was sitting on the edge of the bed and didn't move a single inch, like he didn't notice Castiel waking up.

"Dean?" Castiel called hesitatingly.

Dean turned his head and his face made into the moonlight lidding his exhausted features. The hunter looked calm and mostly emotionless which was very unusual for him.

"What are you doing here?" asked the angel, as he understood that Dean wasn't going to talk.

"Just tired of running." Dean said.

"What do you mean?" The angel inquired. "What are you running from?"

"You…" Dean simply answered, like it had to make everything clear.

"Me?"

"Yes."

Suddenly Dean moved closer to Castiel, placing his palm on angel's chest then he leaned forward and placed his lips on Castiel's, making the angel squint in surprise. The fake Dean had never kissed Castiel before, but this Dean wasn't kissing either. The layer of sharp teeth dag in the sensitive skin of Castiel lips making the angel taste blood in his mouth. The whole room started to shake and the terrible smell of fish and morass, the shorter man had already managed to forget, sank back into Castiel's nostrils.

"Had to do it from the very beginning," whispered Dean after they parted their lips, "had to simply eat you from the very beginning, not to waste my time on all this masquerades. But, at least you taste better right now." Dean concluded with a wide inhuman smile and rushed on top of the angel once again, tearing the flash of Castiel's vessel with his teeth.

~ooo~

A loud scream in the middle of the night made Dean jump from the couch he was sleeping on. It took him a whole minute to understand what was going on, but when he did, he rushed to the small bedroom where they left Castiel for the night, nearly knocking down Sam who was heading in the same direction.

"Cas!" He yelled bursting into the bedroom.

The angel seemed like he was still asleep, yelling out loud something incoherent and tumbling in the bed, pushing the blanket off himself with his legs. It was the first time for the last five days he woke up screaming and it suddenly frightened Dean a lot.

Without second thoughts, he dashed towards Castiel, grabbing him by shoulders "Wake up, Cas!" Dean ordered shaking his friends. The angel opened his eyes, but it made the whole situation even worse, as now he started to wriggle even more, trying to push the hunter away. "Cas!" Dean groaned and made several steps back, giving the angel time to recover from the nightmare he had probably had a moment ago.

Finally Castiel stopped screaming and looked over himself like he was trying to find something there then he fixed his gaze on two brothers. "Dean?" He surprised blinking and trying to catch his breath.

"Will you cover it?" The younger Winchester asked watching Castiel finally calming down.

"Yeah… yeah, Sammy, go to bed." Dean nodded.

Sam gave his brother an understanding look before going out from the room leaving Dean and Castiel alone and suddenly Dean realized that it was probably his mistake to send Sam away, as the situation became extremely awkward. Castiel of course stopped screaming, but the air of panic never casted out from his face. The angel was laying motionless on the bad looking at the hunter with terrified eyes, like Dean was about to kill the poor guy.

And it was after they had made those several steps, when Castiel was finally able to keep calm in Dean's presence. Now it looked like they returned on the stage one again. It also occurred to the hunter that it was going to be the first time since the day Dean rescued his friend when he would actually have to speak with him, as the whole that time he had preferred to avoid him.

"Cas, listen," Dean started, "I know it is difficult for you, but damn, I'm not in a much better position. Ok, well, may be in a better one, but still."

The angel was listening to him without replying anything. It really looked like the guy even wasn't sure what was going on around, like he suddenly forgot English and now was listening to some sort of gibberish out of Dean's month.

"Damn it, Cas!" Dean sighed. "What can I do, to make you believe that I'm real? That it wasn't me who has been around you this whole month, that's I'm not going to turn into a some sort of monster?"

"Can I smell you?"

"Because I really have no idea how to prove it to you!.. What?" Dean suddenly blurred hearing Castiel's request.

"Can I smell you?" The angel repeated slowly, making Dean fell into a some sort of stupor.

For a moment they were just staring at each-other not even breathing. Dean felt how the heart in his chest stared to beat faster, every beat echoed in his head like a drum. His mind was spinning fast, trying to understand the reason behind this weird request, because for some reasons it sounded like the dirtiest thing Dean had ever heard, like the angel suddenly asked him to do something extremely private and kinky Dean had never thought about before. Finally Dean was able to regain control over his body and reply something. He really expected that he would question the weird wish, but he found himself simply nodding.

"Ok…" he said and made a step forward.

Dean was able to see that with every step the angel looked more and more nervous and to tell the truth he felt exactly the same. It was even worse than that time when he had been dating a girl in one of his high schools and she had finally allowed Dean to touch her in intimate way for the first time.

Finally Dean came close enough to being able to bend over the bed of his friend. He couldn't stop himself but glancing on Castiel lips and the flashes of memories of what he had been doing with those lips in the police station, together with Dean's own fantasies suddenly started to invade hunter's mind. Dean closed his eyes trying to banish all this thoughts, but it didn't work. Several hot puffs of air on Dean's neck as Castiel was trying to sniff him didn't help this situation anyhow as angel's breath on Dean's skin only sent shivers over taller man's spine making the hair on the small of his back stand on end.

"Hmm…" Castiel finally exhaled against Dean's neck, sending another round of shivers through the whole Dean's body.

The hunter finally tore himself away from the bed, feeling as a huge wave of blush washed over him and settled somewhere around his face.

"So, what was that about?" Dean asked, trying to calm down his nerves.

Castiel this time surprisingly looked more relaxed than he was before, like he finally understood that Dean was telling the truth. Of course his tension never left him totally, but it was a great step already, greater than all other steps he had managed to do during those last days. The angel sighed in relief and this moment something like softened in his eyes. "Dean…" He said quietly, like he saw the hunter for the first time for ages.

Dean funnily exhaled the air he even didn't notice he was holding in his lungs. It still felt really awkward to be around his friend and Dean still wanted to run away and never return in this room, but if Castiel finally recognized him, it was a small price to pay with all this embarrassment.

"Yeah Cas, yeah…" Dean nodded. "It's me."

_To be continued..._


End file.
